I just erased an entire angst filled post full of quotes from the UW study and other articles regarding the whole Baby Einstein conundrum. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go on your merry way obliviously, it’s not worth it) And about how I was sick Thursday and Friday and my kids watched a lot of TV because I felt like poop and I couldn’t deal and apparently? you can’t call in sick as a Mama.

Lame.

Missy E
(This picture has nothing to do with this post, but look! I finished another Baby Quilt, and after sandwiching it put it on the to quilt pile. Now two quilts deep *sigh*)

I erased it because I spent way too much time thinking about it and reassuring myself that I’m not a bad parent because my kids watch Baby Einstein or because I failed to notice that perhaps the reason my 17mth old was so UNBELIEVABLY cranky all week was because he had a stomach bug.

Maybe if he could talk and I hadn’t stunted his verbal skills by letting him watch The Big Blue Mother during his early years, he could have told me. “yo mama, I’ve been pooping my brains out all week and crying alot…I’m sick!”

In my defense the blackberries around here are ripening and he is a berry FAAAHHREEEAAK!

Blackberries Whoa!

Anyway, the whole TV slash brain rot slash low verbal skillz post. Erased. I’m over it. Can you tell?

So I erased the angst ridden post and decided to share with you something, a little more constructive.

I first saw this book mentioned at the always inspiring SouleMama’s blog. And having connections at the library I managed to get it ordered there, and have been slowly reading it.

Finding your inner Mama

I like to savor the chapters, since they are all by different authors and they get me thinking quite a bit. I’m only reading one chapter at a time, some times a few a day, sometimes not. And it really is about finding your inner Mama, in fact I’m thinking about sending it to all my mama pals. I love it that much.

Because when it comes down to the whole Mama thing and who does what and why we do it I have to agree with my pal Legolas who always says.

“I believe in my heart that people are doing the best they can for their children, even if I don’t agree with what they are doing.”

Sometimes it’s hard to keep that at the forefront of your mind. It is so easy to judge other parents. Why is it so easy?

I think because it makes us feel better. Being a parent is the most difficult job there is and everyone feels free all the time to tell you what you are doing wrong, regardless of who they are, their relationship to you, or lack thereof, whether or not they have kids or a pet rock they keep in a box under their bed.

It’s one of those topics that everyone is an expert on. And in their way, they are an expert, on THEIR LIVES. Not yours. And I find it hard to remember but strive to do so anyway that my experience is not everyone else’s and they have to do what they have to do to feel good about being the parent they are.

(No, Legolas, I’m not turning the car seat rear facing again!)

I also agree with Cagey when she said the following regarding the Baby Einstein thing over at Alphamom

    On a serious note, I agree this should be filed under the God Forbid, We Would Trust Parents With Their OWN Children section.

Because uh yeah. What she said. As parents it is so hard. SO HARD. To trust yourself. We are so quick to take the criticism of other, whoever they are, to heart. I truly believe that I am a better parent when I just trust my own judgment.

Which brings us full circle to the book and the little blog project I have in mind for this week.

I’ll be sharing a bit of the writing that spoke to me within each chapter. (Each chapter I read while my kids lose brain skills in front of the Big Blue Mother. I’m like that.)

    from Finding the Inner Mama
    Vulnerability and Other Lessons
    -harriet lerner

    To opt for kids is to opt for chaos, complexity, turbulence and truth. kids will make you love them in a way you never thought possible they will confront you with all the painful and unsavory emotions that humans put so much energy into trying to avoid. Children will teach you about yourself and about what it’s like not to be up to the demands of the most important responsibility you’ll ever have. They’ll teach you that you are capable of deep compassion, and also that you are definitely not the nice, calm competent, clear thinking highly evolved person you fancied yourself to be before you became a mother.”